4CA - Queensland's Home for Fake News

4CA - Queensland's Home for Fake News
4CA - Queensland's Home for Fake News Led by John "Cueball" Mackenzie

15 April 2013


It's all going pear shaped for politics in Cairns, and their LNP mouthpiece John "Cueball" MacKenzie.

After literally screaming about the "appalling crime problem" in Cairns, and continuing attacks against the ALP government and the Val Schier-led Cairns City Council, we're now finding out that comparatively speaking, we're not doing too badly.

Cueball has said Cairns is suffering from "hundreds of car thefts" (or maybe this is hundreds of crocodiles, I can't keep track of the bullshit).  In fact Cairns had 64 car thefts the first three months of 2013.  A horrible figure to be sure, but a long way from hundreds.  Cueball has previously made statements like "dozens of bicycles go missing from Cairns Central every day", and "hundreds of teens are terrorising the CBD", also bullshit. With the new statistical openness by the QPS (a welcome move), this kind of hysteria is now being defused with FACTS.

And then the facts made MacKenzie look like a damned fool when they were revealed. Townsville?  312 car thefts in the same period!  And an overall crime rate DOUBLE that of Cairns!

And from MacKenzie, no mention of a real Queensland Police issue, with the QPS already looking to be in the cost-cut buzzsaw of Joh Bjelke Newman's government. Police are looking to be demoralised and angry with the changes implemented by the LNP and now their pay is under attack.

On Friday, Cairns Non-regional Council Mayor for Vice Terry James came under attack by Martin "Psycho" Tenni and a regular Smithfield clown who demanded that Council stop the persecution prosecution of Sydney developer David Shitari and a dodgy local real estate company for demolishing the heritage-protected Rex Theater.  To his credit Cr. James defended the prosecution, although he struggled to enunciate the reasons.

And a later caller pointed out the obvious - IT'S THE LAW.

Councillors and yes even our local LNP hacks all took an oath that says they will do their jobs "to the best of my ability and according to law".  We all know this was an alien concept to the Queensland government when Tenni was a minister.  

Cynics however suggest that the whole Rex Theater fiasco was a product of the then development department manager Peter Tabulo, who was subsequently knighted as City Manager with no competitive process by Mayor Bob "Sleepy" Manning.  During last week's Council meeting this same development department pushed thru an approval of a medical centre project (with one negative vote, Cr. Pyne) on Sheridan Street adjacent to Florence - with only SEVEN car parks.  This despite Main Roads insisting that this was grossly inadequate, and in VIOLATION OF LOCAL LAW.  So much for law enforcement.

Merchants in the Civic Shopping Centre can look forward to more of their carpark being using by clients of this medical centre, thanks to their councillor Richie Bates and the out-of-control CCC development department.

And later in the day we were told that a medical office project was approved for the Rex Theater site - with 60 CARPARKS!  Obviously from a developer who has more concern about his customers and the community than jamming a few more bucks in his pocket.  

Terry James may not like continuing the Rex Theater prosecution, but the "old boy's club" rules of protecting the incompetent may be the guiding philosophy.

We have local LNP MP's and a mostly new Cairns Council who all mouthed the phrases "zero tolerance" and "common sense government" as the panacea for everything.  But as they continue to exhibit their own lack of common sense the community is getting very cranky with the lack of action and grossly stupid decision-making (like the Kuranda Un-Boot Un-Camp).


Anonymous said...

Throb man and his dickophants with help from the reporter, hide the backhoe and the stench should make it very easy for any person with an IQ level over 50 to see the damage these gutless lnp grubs have done to this city and region. It will only be worse if the voters of this city and region vote abbott in.

Bob R. said...

Mackenzie has been ranting on and on about "law and order" for decades in this city. Nothing has changed in the thirty years or so he has been raving, frothing and foaming at the mouth. Cunning political animals like Gavin King like to campaign on it and promise the usual wankers' wet dreams about "knowing how to solve the crime problem". It's a great political carrot to suck in the voters with. Then nothing happens but a lot of hot air, blah blah yadda yadda yakkety yak. Christ, don't worry, it will be coming up again and again over the next several decades with a long line of Gavin King clones all boasting they know how to deal with it, blah blah yadda yadda. Shit, "crime in the city" as a topic will keep old rugnut going for another few decades as well.

jim-bob jnr home sick said...

Yeah King had the answer didn't he? Bloody fucken oath he did. More coppers on the beat. Yeah, like where the hell are they? Then send the offending kids off to "Boot Camp" but hey only if they want to go and only if the kids are fair dinkum about changing their behaviour. Yeah, that'll solve it all. And pigs are gunna fly too. You're not wrong there Bob R. Old rugnut will be frothing away about crime in the city for another couple of decades yet, the same ole same ole same ole. Like a boring broken down record.

CBD Warrior said...

Some caller today asked why the police continue organise "blitzes" for crime fighting, and then tell the crims about the blitz. The funny thing about the latest "blitz", operation Iron Dishpan or whatever it's called, is that the focus is on crime in the northern beaches. Crime supposedly running rampant for YEARS in the "M" suburbs, and the first blitz is to protect the "rich people suburbs".

MacKenzie is seeing his world turned upside down, and doesn't know what to do.. . .

Jethro said...

I'm afraid the old Rex Theatre never appealled to my sense of aesthetics. I'm glad the old wreck is gone to be frank. I would rather we had kept the line of old hotels along the Barbary Coast as part of a historical precinct however the LNP Council of Ron Davis rejected the proposal of a historical precinct for Cairns way back in the late 1970s. So many old historic buildings were ripped down during Davis' term in office that old Cairns disappeared forever.

ruby said...

The Boot Camp is nothing more than another slap on the wrist albeit a more expensive one. Wait and see what the LNP and its compliant media machine do after a few kids have been through it. I predict we will read these warm and fuzzy fluff pieces in The Cairns Post about where these dangerous kids all had these amazing life-changing epiphanies and are now all going to devote their lives to good deeds, saving the poor and rescuing abused puppies and kittens. King will be pictured alongside them looking like St Francis of Assisi himself. Can't you just picture it??

John S. said...

ROFL ruby, I sure can, along with warm and fuzzy headlines like - "SAVING THE YOUTH OF CAIRNS" - along with a picture of King looking like J.C. himself. Then there will be the fantastic claims that since the Boot Camp had opened, youth crime had decreased by 10,000 percent blah blah. All bullshit but King and Safe Pathways are going to have to justify the funding somehow. It's all bloody easy when it isn't a government department to invent results just to satisfy the public. Too easy.

Anonymous said...

You mean the BOOT HOUSE John S.

Observer said...

As has been pointed out in this facebook site many times - Governments must be SEEN to be doing something, not actually DOING anything. It's all about perceptions for the community to suck up.
So we have the Boot Camps, the "Claytons" reformatory which Gavin King and the LNP told us we had to have. A nice cosy little holiday camp for some willing kids at a far greater cost to the taxpayers than spending a month or so up at Lotus Glen working on the farm there, doing hard bloody yakka. (You can't have the kids doing hard yakka, can you?)
You betcha King and the NGO provider Safe Pathways will sing their own bloody praises to the roof tops. It's easy money for an NGO and King is far too egotistical and ambitious to ever admit failure. The Cairns Post will be complicit in whatever deceit and misinformation is required and half the community will suck it all up. You can bet your last dollar King will be campaigning on this during the next election.

Crystal Ball-Gazer said...

Fast forward to August 2015

"GAVIN KING - SAVING THE YOUTH OF THE FAR NORTH" by Chief Political Reporter, Tori Mirrorbelle-Golddigga

The troubled youth of North Queensland have found themselves a champion of champions. A man who will be linked to such luminaries as St Francis of Assisi, Lord Baden-Powell, Fred Hollows and Rupert Murdoch. A man who stands taller amongst other men for his vision, compassion and faith in the potential of our youth, a man who wouldn't say "No" when it was easy to do so. Here is a man who not only saw the path ahead, but he himself carved it out, often alone and jeered at by others. His was a herculean task, a task scorned by those around him, but he persisted, against enormous odds. He persisted because of his belief in himself, his God and the goodness of the young people he devoted to saving and despite his critics, and there were plenty of those, he was proven right. I am writing about our very own hero, Gavin King, MP, Member for Cairns, a man I find very modest and unassuming about his spectacular achievements which have blown out beyond all expectations.
He single handedly with his vision for the daring, courageous, innovative concept of "Boot Camps" wrought an amazing turnaround in youth crime statistics for Cairns. Police confirm that since the opening of the Kuranda "Boot House" as it is called in 2003, there has been a 250% drop in youth crime in the Far North.
Senior Police Constable, Uriah Heep told The Cairns Post that crime in the city business district has practically disappeared, while youth crime in the suburbs is limited to a few "break-ins" every couple of months.
"What Mr King has done is just unbelievable," said Senior Constable Uriah Heep. "He really needs a Knighthood or something, some reward to acknowledge the outstanding contribution he has made here in his role as an MP. Truy, I have never seen anything like it in my life!"
Northern Cairns resident, Pearl Wangetti confirmed Constable Heep's words. "Look," Ms Wangetti said, "Even I now feel safe to walk along the Cairns Esplanade wearing just my bikini pants at 2 o'clock in the morning, and it's all thanks to our own God given Gavin King."
4CA radio announcer, John Mackenzie, often a strong critic of Gavin King, had nothing but heaps of praise for the Member of Parliament. "I get taxi drivers tell me over and over," he said, "that crime is non-existent in the city today, thanks to the Boot House at Kuranda and Gavin King's amazing vision."
As a special commendation for this outstanding member of our community, The Cairns Post has written to the Prime Minister of Australia, in support of a Knighthood for our very own superhero. The community can never be grateful enough.


Jethro said...

Well now Crystal Ball-Gazer, your sentence construction, your use of quotes and your grammar would all indicate you are no stranger to the world of journalism. I have wondered about you before. Am I correct in thinking we have a real journo posting on this facebook site? You gave me a few laughs here by the way.

Seth said...

Bah, not sycophantic enough for The Cairns Post, Crystal Ball-Gazer.
This is what you should have written:

"My hands were moist. My heart was hammering. I was starting to hyper-ventilate. Quickly I sat down, put my clammy hands over my nose and started breathing slowly. Slowly, in and out.
Once again, I marvelled at my good fortune. My sheer luck in being able to interview IN PERSON, the man most admired in Queensland. The man the polls kept on saying was the most popular politician ever seen in Australia. The man soon to receive the highest honour in the Queen's birthday list, a Knighthood of the Realm, no less.
I felt myself tremble and my legs turn to jelly. However I was starting to breathe normally.
Suddenly, my heart lurched as the door opened. This woman stepped out and motioned me forward.
"His Worship, the Honourable Gavin King, will see you now," she said in a grave whisper.
Trembling, I stood up and walked to the door. There HE was, sitting behind this enormous desk.
I bowed low, as we all must in the face of greatness. "Your Worship!" I stuttered -----"

There, now that's an appropriate opening for The Cairns Post.

Smithfield Sam said...


LOVE the new header on the blog! Me and my office mates laughed about it for 20 minutes.

Good on'ya.

Anonymous said...

Love the humour -keep it up!

Anonymous said...

You got the style of The Cairns Post to a 't" crystal ball gazer. I reckon you probably write for the rag hey.

Anonymous said...

The wackjobs were out on Mackenzie today, shrilling away about Al Qaeda arriving with the refugee boats. Old rugnut who told us Saddam had weapons of mass destruction is now an expert on Al Qaeda. Oh the caller believes the boats are arriving en masse at the moment because "they" know that Tony Abbott will be Prime Minister after September.
King and Trout jostled for time on the program as per usual, ths time talking about how marvellous they are in PNG.

Anonymous said...

Yes someone needs to let The Cairns Post know what they sound more and more like these days. They have given up all pretense of being objective and fair, but they could try being a little less sycophantic.

jim-bob snr said...

Someone raised the Boot Camp issue but no-one is bothering to raise the fact that the $375 million extensions to Lotus Glen Prison remain unused with no-one in them. Bloody marvellous isn't it. The Anna Bligh Labor Government embark on the largest expansion and re-development of an occupied correctional centre in Australia, but before they could fill it up, the LNP get voted in, on a platform of Labor "spending too much money", so they slash staff and funding all over the place, including Prisons, leave the new extension at Lotus Glen unoccipied, and then give millions away to an unknown company to run a Boot Camp. Yeah, make sense huh?

Anonymous said...

jim bob snr

It makes no sense at all. that's the reality of this government, they make no sense

Anonymous said...

The idea that the boot camp is going to reduce crime in Cairns is strangely ironic, seeing as referrals from magistrates can come from Cairns, the Tablelands and the Cassowary Coast. You may not even see any of the youth from Cairns go through the program.
In some of the early conversations about boot camp it was mentioned that offenders could come from as far away as Brisbane and would be flown here after sentencing.

Anonymous said...

Yeah 20 referrals a year to the Boot Camp, from all over Queensland. Shit that's going to help isn't it? NOT

Liz said...

I hope we see some more stuff from Tori Mirrorbelle-Golddigga, Chief Political Reporter. She sounds just errr ummmm - ummm - so TORY doesn't she?

Anonymous said...

Report on ABC News today:
The Cairns and Tablelands regional councils were assessed as being at moderate risk of becoming financially unsustainable. Where is our deputy Mayor Terry James? On a junket to China of course. So much for Sleepy Bob's claim to keep rates static.

Anonymous said...

To Anonomous 12.52

And spending 100's of millions on a 1000 seat (filled once every 3 months) cultural cringe centre was going to improve the bottom line - I don't think so.
The Val/Anna/Julia way of doing things was/is "rack up the credit card".
Someone else will pay for it.
As we are finding out now.
Thank God for ex Army Engineers!

Anonymous said...

Sleepy Bob is only in for one term, then hes going to piss off without doing anything at all. So long suckerrrrrrrs, ta for the money. Bwah hahahahahahaha.

Anonymous said...

I see your sense of comedy anon 21:05 as we know that a cultural precinct would have been of significant benefit to the Cairns region. You only have to look at the past use by date Civic Theatre bursting at the seams. It would certainly have been used more frequently than the pie in the sky square stadium that Sleepy wants. But, thanks to Bob and Gav, when our entertainment precinct is opened in Townsville we will get a better idea of its usefulness won't we.

Anonymous said...

Anonymus 21.05, do you understand what a "precinct" is? You utter dickhead. For chrissakes read a dictionary before you post your inane comments in here. The Entertainment Precinct was much more than a performing arts theatre, you moron. See where Manning has made media announcements saying he is "GUNNA" yeah, he's 'GUNNA' sit down with the State Government or Federal Government to get funding for extensions to the Convention Centre and a new multi storey car park as well as a performing arts theatre. ALL of these were contained within the original Entertainment Precinct that Val Schier outlined, however that demented old fool Manning gave all the funding back.

Anonymous said...

Well said anon 08:20. The river of money from the state and federal government that would have flowed through the city and region from the entertainment centre and the lake street development could have been considered 'short term diversity' to the regions existing industries and in doing so allowed business to put their best foot forward in preference to feeling stuck in the grave of uncertainty. Newman, the reporter, the mayor, trout, entch and that macenzie have reduced the cities potential and we may never see that sort of money invested in this city again. It is terrible when you look at the damage they have caused to our prospects of moving forward...

ruby said...

If Manning ever does honour his election promise of building a new performing arts theatre, it will be a second rate cheap as chips one which will end up costng us ratepayers far far more than what Val Schier proposed, because thanks to Manning's idiocy, we ratepayers will have to pay for the thing entirely by ourselves. My guess is Manning has no intention of doing anything but make a lot of empty noise, and will then hand over the issue to the next incoming Council while he laughs his guts out at how easily people were deceived. Manning is nothing but a compulsive liar and bullshit artist.

Tony Hillier said...

What Cairns needs like a thunder ball serve to the head is another pie in the sky sports complex like the "international" tennis centre in North Cairns. On my thrice (sometimes four or five) weekly excursions to the neighbouring Tobruk Pool, I have rarely spotted anyone in the complex — let alone a tennis player! Was it really necessary to build more than a dozen courts?? Was any market research undertaken leading up to this palpable white elephant??? The money would have been infinitely better spent on upgrading Tobruk Pool, a very well patronised public utility that is urgently in need of refurbishment. Mayor Manning and his supine councillors are currently sleeping on that one zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

shangai said...

hey tony why cant they extend the outer gates to meet then hockey swimming and tennis are in the one place

Anonymous said...

Hillier - what makes you think the Tennis Centre was a Council initiative for christsake?
It was a Anna Bligh (your taxes) and Queensland Tennis that ran the planning for this.

Anonymous said...

Another Federal Election coming up, so Entsch will trot out his rectangular footie stadium idea AGAIN and the rednecks will all swoon all over again, and race down to the polls on election day like donkeys going after a carrot.
Its a pretty good trick I must say, gets the rednecks going every time. Most of them dont know that Townsville is putting in for a super stadium and Entsch isn't going to tell them either.