With Queensland's economy struggling as the result of LNP sackings, Cairns CBD rapidly becoming a ghost town, and Joh Bjelke Newman continuing to gut vital services, Queenslanders were shocked at the cash splash for the new royal baby announced today from Brisbane.
In a Joint Statement from the "Three Kings of the LNP" Newman, Springborg, and Bleijie, a raft of gifts to rival The Price is Right will be sent not just to the royal bub, but to many lucky Queensland breeders - along with their $5,000 federal baby bonus.
Queensland will send a "commemorative boxed medallion" (shown here) to the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, along with all the other useless shit people are sending one of the wealthiest families in the world. Replicas of the medallion will also be awarded to all babies born in Queensland on 22 July.
But wait, there's more. All 2013 Queensland bubs will get special commemorative birth certificates along with a "Buy One, Get One Free" at all participating Hungry Jack's.
AG Jerrold Bleijie confirmed that a raft of government buildings would be lit up special in celebration, including Parliament House, Wheel of Brisbane, Queensland Performing Arts Centre, along with bridges in and around Brisbane. With electricity rate rises of over 22% recently, Bleijie said to reporters 'who cares, it's you fuckers that pay the government's electric bill'.
Newman also suggested a "major civic building" might be named after the new Prince - leading suggestion is the "Clem 7 - Prince "Hungry Jack" Bankrupt Tunnel".
Member for Cairns Gavin "Don't Rape Me" King had no comment from his rathole.
Thanks to Loose Change for the heads up. .