4CA - Queensland's Home for Fake News

4CA - Queensland's Home for Fake News
4CA - Queensland's Home for Fake News Led by John "Cueball" Mackenzie

31 July 2014


Since last weekend, the bogan media has been whipped into a frenzy about the "great new project" that is now up for development approval before the Cairns Council.

The project has been named "Central Park Cairns" - it has neither a park, nor is it central to anything - jammed behind the police station and courthouse, hard up to the railroad tracks.  

Gavin "Don't Rape Me" King crowed "I've met Mr. Koh (Wee Seng, Aspial CEO) several times and I'm extremely impressed with Aspial's diligence, professionalism, and design principals.  This is truly an exciting time to live in Cairns".

Bob "Sleepy" Manning was roused and spewed "Cairns, and indeed this region, is on the cusp of the most exciting time in its history".  This after calling the Aquis resort and CASINO "a whole new paradigm".

So why is Cairns the recipient of such Singaporean largess from Koh Wee Seng and his company?

Because we're about to see Cairns transformed into a completely Asian city, with standards much lower than those demanded even in Singapore - standards that are only acceptable in Mainland China.

The Cairns nonRegional Council has posted on their development applications website the package of fancy drawings and lovely colour renderings of the beautiful towers Aspial is planning. (Can't hotlink, sorry).  Clearly much more impressive than the prison towers built by Tom Hedley in his runup to bankruptcy.

But Koh is building a project that WOULD NOT GET
APPROVAL FOR A UNIT PROJECT IN SINGAPORE.  And the biggest breach of Singaporean development requirements?  The project would not meet Singaporean law on minimum floor area in each apartment. 

The law, called the "Shoebox Apartment" law, was implemented as greedy developers built smaller and smaller apartments while jacking up the prices there.  This not only pushed low and middle income residents into deplorable living conditions, it overloads the area infrastructure.  Since November of 2012, the Urban Redevelopment Authority in Singapore has required the AVERAGE apartment size in a project be 70 sq meters.

70 square meters isn't even very much.  Most of the Hedley apartments around the CBD are  85+ square meters, and most have higher than average height ceilings.  

But wait to you see the shit that Koh wants to build.

Tower one, the first up for DA, has an average unit size of:


Even the two bedroom units, about half the total, are only 66.9 square meters!

And along with this rabbit hutch that wouldn't even be allowed in Singapore, Koh has asked for fewer on-site carparks than even the deficient Cairns code requires - HUNDREDS FEWER, under the delusion that "CBD Living" without a car will ever be the norm in Cairns.

I didn't see any proposal for a subway, however.

"A whole new paradigm?"  "An exciting time to live in Cairns?"

Yes, we're about to sign it over to non-Australians, with non-Australian living standards.  The elderly and poor are now sitting in the dark at night, with electricity too expensive to use.  A growing number of citizens can't afford homeowner's insurance, so they're sitting in the dark hoping that they don't have a fire or a burglary.  And now we're being told the future for Australia is as a third-world, has-been country as we're stuffed into apartmentoriums.  Welcome to the Queensland Plan!  



CBD Warrior said...

And I thought my unit was small. Another scoop from HBW. Great work mates!

Second Anonymous said...

We have lots of people living in prime real estate caravan parks (Palm Cove would be our premium)who could be relocated to the shoe-box developments.

The prime caravan park real estate owned by the Dept of Housing on the Sunshine Coast (beachfront) was the first land to be sold by the LNP to developers when they won office.

And you will not find this info under RTI. Seems almost everything since this government took control is "commercial-in-confidence."


Anonymous said...

I'm sure Aquis could find a use for the rabbit hutches, they won't need cars, even if they can afford them, Aquis will bus them to work and bring them back.

Are there clothes lines strung between the blocks on the plan?

Anonymous said...

"We have lots of people living in prime real estate caravan parks (Palm Cove would be our premium)"

Yes and they are all subsidised by the ratepayer.
Let 'em live in shoe box I say.

If you drink, smoke and gamble then Palm Cove is to good for you.

Shoebox apartment it is, I'm afraid.

Anonymous said...

Is it a big place for little people or compared to the aquis plan (which ever design is real) is it a little place for little people

Anonymous said...

These are obviously being proposed/built for the cheap chinese labour that will be needed for Aquis building and staffing because only those individuals will need this type of accommodation. Back packers use the vans and locals at the very least have a degree of self respect. The dream goes on that locals will be employed for building and staff at Aquis.Right.

Anonymous said...

How true! After working in Macau for 6 years and living in an apartment complex comprised of 16 towers, each with around 200 plus apartments in each tower, with most apartments not much bigger than my current toilet - at a price starting around 15000 plus HKD per month (and that was cheap), with everyday renovations ALL DAY LONG, loud enough to wake up even the current CCC, lookout Cairns - as Melanie once sang "you don't know what you've got till its gone they paved paradise and put up a parking lot". Bend over folks and kiss it goodbye!!!

Anonymous said...

AQUIS staff could pool their resources and live in a 3 bedroom house with a swimming pool instead of a depressing hole. I hope they are not enslaving staff by dictating where they live then charging them from their pay. That would be evil.

Anonymous said...

Very short sighted. Especially as building standards seem to be in decline as well. Has it been explained why Gavin King is involved? Sounds dodgy or is he still after the Mayors job?

Tony Hillier said...

If all these hideous and totally inappropriate Chinese developments actually happen — and it's a big 'if' — I would envisage an exodus from Cairns and suburbs by long-time locals in the next few years. Much will depend on the make-up of the next Cairns Regional Council and the quality of the politicians. They could hardly be more inept or indolent that our current representatives. Fingers crossed the bogans that now constitute the majority in the region wake up to what's happening. It's a huge 'if' on all counts. How do you awaken the brain dead?

Anonymous said...

Think you might mean Joni anon 08:54. Melanie sung about beetles in matchboxes. Actually that works too!

Anonymous said...

Yes, Cairns will be forever changed, just like the Gold Coast. The time is now ripe for the big money to move in and dictate to a compliant hillbilly council and state government totally out of their depth and greedy for money. Yes there will be an exodus of Cairns locals as was on the Gold Coast years ago when the big money kicked in. But it has happened in the past up here. Many Palm Cove residents left (some quite rich) as their beach shacks were bought up for shiny new condos and hotels. Watch out Machans. Nothing stays the same so for people like myself who came here many decades ago for the lifestyle it will be time to move on. C'est la vie. Sadly.

Anonymous said...

Anon But we will never see those high rents or real estate values because Australia is massive and gambling is legal all over. Macau such a small place where gambling is legal and because it is close to massive population centres. This will just be another backpackers. We are not being smart in Cairns at the moment and it could screw our chances forever.

Though just one tower? So they get approval for 7 towers but will only build one so work will be about as much as the Bunning centre offers?

I think there HAS to be a time limit on constructions after approval. If not already. Booking 1500 units puts us in future over supply so why would anyone else invest? Then if this does not go through we have stalled for no good reasons. I already suspect investment has stalled due to AQUIS. Why even try to compete.

Local lad. said...

CRC buy cnr abbott & aplin put some benches there & call it Central Park after whats left of Central School grounds. Local lad.

Anonymous said...

Is Gavin King trying to soften his image with a "humorous" column in The CP today or is he trying to get his old gig back ?

Problem is that even those who used to think that his columns were hilarious (remember the juvenile crap about val Schier's hair and the Ukelele festival ?) aren't laughing anymore.

One of his greatest admirers, Pearl from Wangetti, wrote a blistering attack on Jeff Seeney and the LNP in Letters to the Editor today.

It might well be a sign of things to come...

Can't wait for McKenzie to read it out loud on Monday morning ,sniggering like a schoolboy. That will be the cue for the King of Spin to ring up "unexpectedly" for some more self promotion. How banal.

Anonymous said...

Tony Hillier said...
"I would envisage an exodus from Cairns and suburbs by long-time locals in the next few years."

And yet you're still here you brain dead moron!

You were publishing crap like that in the Bar Fly 20 years ago.

Admit it - you won't leave.

Anonymous said...

I think many people will leave. Higher real estate values will be short lived and only related to construction phase. After that Cairns will be locked into a 3rd rate economy.

Anonymous said...

Anon 19:11 quite right and my error!!!
Hazy days of the past!

Peter W said...

Cairns is out of control. Get real all those people who think a Singapore life is good for Australia.

Anonymouse said...

I wonder how long it will take the Chinese government to realise how much money there is in Casinos, and legalise them.

If they did it half way through the construction of Aquis we would end up with huge, unfinished, monument to greed.

Good for Cairns though, where Chinese money goes, triads go.

Anonymous said...

Pretty brave of you Anon 20:14 calling someone who posts their real name a brain dead moron whilst too cowardly to state yours. Says it all really.

Mickey Mouse said...

How do you know that's his real name?

Tony Hillier said...

"Mickey Mouse" I can confirm it is my "real name" — I don't live in Disneyland!

Peter Morris said...

Anon 12:54: Says the person posting from the anonymous account.

Anon 12:54 said...

Yes Peter Morris, but I wasn't calling anyone brain dead morons, so what is your problem?

Peter Morris said...

My problem is that you refered him/her as cowardly, whilst hiding behind an anonymous name. Says it all really.

Morris Peters said...

So I'm assuming then that you are endorsing cowardly comments behind an anonymous name? Or do you just not like Mr Hillier? sounds like troll material to me'Peter'.

Anonymous said...

It was simply a response to Hillier (if that his/her real name) saying "How do you awaken the brain dead?"

shanghai said...

don't worry pilgrims it wont happen your getting your nickers in a knot for nothing ..its too close to the ccc chambers the last bastion of white australia