4CA - Queensland's Home for Fake News

4CA - Queensland's Home for Fake News
4CA - Queensland's Home for Fake News Led by John "Cueball" Mackenzie

14 June 2016

WARREN ENTSCH, FAILED REPRESENTATIVE: A LOOK BACK AT HIS MOST MASSIVE FAILURES - 6 in a Series

Cairns Federal Member Warren Entsch, who also serves as the Minister for Blogs, can only be described as an abject failure as our elected representative.

When first elected along with the John Howard government, he looked to have the
ear of the Prime Minister and other front benchers.  While this translated into little for the Far North, Labor was unable to find any candidates to take him down.  

We should say that HBW is fully in support of same-sex marriage.  We're surprised how quickly public opinion on this subject has changed over the last 10-15 years - a change we attribute to the realisation by the public that sexuality is genetically determined.  We've seen a huge number of gay men and women, married up with straight partners in some kind of sexual identity coverup, that blow up 10 or 15 years later with disastrous consequences - usually on the children.  Elimination of these sham marriages with unsuspecting partners is good enough for us.

What most people don't know is that Warren Entsch has voted time and time again AGAINST same sex marriage, as well as domestic partnerships.  As recently as September 9, 2012, Entsch cast a NO vote on legislation he's now spruiking as his own private member's bill.  Entsch has also been reportedly heard instigating vile comments about former Cairns Mayor Val Schier - the core of which was derision at her sexuality.  Now we're supposed to believe his epiphany on gay marriage? 

But he's a pollie, and fully entitled to be on both sides of an issue.  Insert laugh track here.

In a bizarrely Brokeback Mountain-ish interview with a reporter named Tim Dick at The Age (really, you can't make this shit up) in June of 2006, Entsch describes growing up in some gay/transvestite friendly country town where he was the "blokiest bloke" around.  Wasn't that called "Petticoat Junction"? 

All of this interview occurred while Entsch was proffering photos of "his missus", posing in lingerie, to Dick.  As this was 2006, it is unclear if this was his most recent "missus", Yolonde Werner Entsch, to whom he married in 2011.  But it would seem not - Yolonde's daughter MacKenzie (named after ol' cueball???) would seem to have been born while Entsch was fondling another woman's naughty photos and proclaiming his "loving her to bits".  But we'll let someone else do the math. . .

It should also be noted that in Yolonde, who's held several very long titles in the federal government like "Acting Assistant Secretary to the Traveling Secretary to the Minister of Blogs", apparently struck up this marriage while violating the long-established principal about shitting where you eat.  She's now busy working the Entsch name like the networking pro she is.  And she's now calling herself "The Ambassador" for her connection to some locally-based hospital ship.

The inability of someone like Entsch to get married to his nephew, or any transgendered person, might have been at the core of these damaged "straight" marriages.  Hurting children and ex-partners in the process.  This is apparently at the heart of Entsch's steadfast, on-and-off support of gay marriage in Australia.

We're not here to question the validity of this, Entschy's
THIRD marriage, to a woman with just slightly more hair on her head then he has. Let's imagine, for the sake of argument, that Warren Entsch - queer as a three dollar coin - has married and divorced two other women in an unfortunate attempt to hide his secret fondness for the lifestyle of his self-described nephew, who had a "great set of boobs and short-shorts, bouncing around".  All from the Age interview.  You can't make this shit up.

The inability of someone like Entsch to get "married" to his nephew, or ANY transgendered person, might have been at the core of his failed "straight" marriages.  Not excessive drinking, or continual rumours of staff member harassment (in an office with years of staff turnover).  Is this at the core of Entsch's continual pushing for gay marriage?  While ignoring all the other serious issues in the electorate - insurance, highway and hospital investment, roads, etc.  

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

A caller to the Cueball show, discussing a meeting of a group of to protest the lack of action by Warren Entsch on the insurance issue, said "it's not a gay marriage debate, it's something REALLY important".  Quick as a whip MacKenzie, keen to deflect any criticism of his matey Entsch, remarked "what is the context for that terminology?"  Like we don't all know what a catastrophe Warren Entsch has been for Cairns.

13 comments:

Anonymous said...

Pure gold! HBW at its best! Funniest fucking article I've read in years. Wazza's life sounds like a dream to someone living in Hollywood, the story contains references to country living in a queer community, nephew rooting, shims, short haired carpet munchers, it's got the lot!!!

Warren, let your feelings go mate. Go on, embrace a man and get it on. You know you want too.

Anonymous said...

Question; what woman has the middle name "WERNER"? WTF? Is she really a she? To me the name Werner conjures up images of a man wearing lederhosen, a man with a dark moustache drinking stein's of beer in a German club, a man with a fetish for 'water sports', a man with Eurpoean skin and hung like a donkey! But a woman? Makes you wonder.

Anonymous said...

Anon 0952....nice try but Werner was her maiden name.

Steve Arso said...

Really close to the truth HBW. Take it from someone like me that nearly lived in his closet (er Office actually) And he had the gall to accuse me of sexually harrassing a member of staff.

Anonymous said...

Maybe Entsch will dance a farewell waltz with Kevin Brown at Kevin's farewell party? It would be a perfect match really, with Wazza and his passion for gay rights and Kevin with his passion for high heels. Perhaps they will light up the airport control tower with rainbow colours, a fitting symbol of the regions sexuality and reputation for being the second gay capital of Australia, second to Sydney.

Anonymous said...

I think for us the mathematics of this election is simple; Cairns is populated by retards. Coconut Husk Manning had no formidable competition. Warren 'gay pride' Entsch has no formidable competition. Although these two arseclowns are exactly that, arseclowns, there is no competition strong enough to replace them. With Sleepy already asleep in his office after being returned to his plum retirement package for another term, that leaves one to go, Fatboy. He will get voted back in, gaurenteed. That's why Turnbull isn't bribing us with funding, cash, goodies, super stadiums or anything else, he simply doesn't have to because we will be a cheap win for him. By contrast Townsville is different, 150,000 people, a smart city who have been demanding change. Townsville is a concern to both major parties, hence the current pork barrelling which includes a $250 million stadium that has got the locals all excited and Annastacia wet in the crotch....as usual, the handful of smart Cairns residents will be outdone by the vast majority of inhabitants who are fucktards and are only capable of voting for imbeciles. Between Manning and Wazza our region over the coming 4 years will fall behind by another 20 years, which means by 2020 Cairns as a region will be sitting somewhere around 1985!!

IVA BIGGIN said...

What about Howie Thomas wife she would make a good candidate wouldn't she?

Anonymous said...

Anon 952, you are an idiot. PMSL that anon 422 is banging on about retards.....they are all here commenting.

Anonymous said...

Annon 10:27 - maybe for a gangbang. That's about all.

Arthur Penis said...

Whats a gangbang

Hamish Krint said...

With a last name like Penis you don't know?????? What a sheltered life you have led.......

Anonymous said...

Ironically, Postie from Georgetown moved on to bigger and better things. Warrren is still working out his feelings thirty-five years later.

Anonymous said...

Entsch is waiting to come out of the closet. His new wife is a trannie he met while living in Canberra. She was previously known as Andy. True story.